We discuss the worst exotic dancer names. Mildred and Walter topped the list.

We also talk fake breasts vs real breasts and why do hack doctors put a huge space in between fake breasts. If you are going to get fake breasts, make sure it doesn’t have a huge space in between them.

Is talking dirty hot? How about talking dirty in Portuguese.

Nersin knows specific stripper routines. He has either gone to this location way too many times, or the strippers are not original. Hack exotic dancers who don’t change up their routines are like hack comics.

We reminisce about going to strip clubs when we snuck in during our teenage years.

Real stripper names vs fake stage names.

Why do women go to gentlemen’s clubs. Are they straight or lesbian? Or bi because they are there with their boyfriends usually.

Nersin’s theory is that all women have a percentage of lesbian in them.

Trying to pick up a female spectator in the strip club.

Daveed asks the very interesting question, what is the maximum over under on the acceptable stripper age?

Why is the waitress in a strip club usually the hottest woman in the place? Ugly strippers costs just as much as hot strippers, so why take an ugly stripper to the back?

There is a woman in the audience who kisses a dancer on stage, and goes up onto the stage.

A stripper asks us if we’d like to go to the back for a dance. Listen to find out what happens next.

Women are allowed to touch in strip clubs but men are not. This woman is getting squirmy in her seat touching and watching the stripper on stage.

Strippers who ask us to go for dances are getting rick rolled.

Why you have to own your shit.

It’s hard to make it rain in Canada because the loonies would hurt.

Are football celebrations getting out of control?

Celebrity children have a tough upbringing because the media goes after them hard.

Isn’t John Travolta gay?

Women who wear scarfs, is that a secret hint that they like to be choked when having sex?

Women at the strip club goes to the back to get a dance.

The guys discuss if they would be careful bringing their steady girlfriends to the strip club with them.

The boys talk about their strip club memories in Poland. Buying a drink for a stripper in a strip club in Europe is more expensive than buying yourself a drink.

The post Strip Club Podcast appeared first on Squeels and Wheezies Podcast.

We talk about effed up relationship scenarios where the woman is cheating on her man in his own house, in front of him. A quick lesson in how credit works.

Nersin tells Daveed about Tyson’s first meeting with Brad Pitt. Then we talk Hulk Hogan and his ex wife. We talk prenuptial agreements.

Justin Gatlin’s new infomercial about Tommy Copper. Is Usain Bolt on steroids? We talk about conspiracy theories in sports.

Garageband is dead to us.

Georges Rush St. Pierre splits with his manager. Dana White doesn’t make any sense after Georges Rush St. Pierre’s last fight. Who would win, Anderson Silva vs. Jon Jones?

We talk boxing, Pacquiao vs Mayweather. It will likely never happen.

Do all Lesbians get John Mayor haircuts?

Gay jail.

Techniques on how to cry on queue. Don’t take yourself too seriously.

Based on a true story movies are not true stories. The differences between based on a true story and inspired by a true story.

Daveed drops an innocuous Jay Z lyric.

The average lifeline of a podcast.

Youtube will not allow you to humiliate anyone.

Hipsters is a problem everywhere.

Too many people take derogatory terms offensively.

Daveed’s genius theory about naming five players on any team you claim to be a fan of.

Should athletes and musicians get involved in politics?

Would a gay for podcast t-shirt be offensive? Macklemore is gay.

The post Gay Jail appeared first on Squeels and Wheezies Podcast.

P Diddy is once again a guest on the show.

Relaxed drug laws in Portugal. Nersin is absolutely shocked. But this is no news for Daveed and P Diddy. Is legalizing crime the way to reduce crime rates? Of course it is as there is less crime to report on. But what about the ancillary crimes. They must go down too. Not many countries have the balls to legalize drugs.

Barack Obama takes a selfie at the Nelson Mandela memorial. Daveed asks us if we’d sleep with Michelle Obama. It’s a unanimous decision. Find out what it was.

P Diddy drops a bomb and introduces us to the tweet about Africa heard around the world. By now everyone in the twitterverse knows the name Justine Sacco. Where is she now? I hope she’s okay. We all deserve a second chance. Did she ever recover from her twitter debacle?

Gilbert Gottfried should take P Diddy’s advice when he says to protect your checks. Gilbert Gottfried got fired for not abiding by Aflac’s code of conduct clause. The jokes he tweeted during the Tsunami might have been too soon. If he said those jokes on the stage he likely would have received barrels of laughter from the audience.

A crazy tradition to shoot your machine gun during a wedding leads to horror. Who knew?

Lululemon stock drops because the CEO told everyone what he was thinking. Why do women get so pissed off over the “f” word.

Daveed has a genius strategy for getting a rise out of women and it involves the Bachelor or Bachelorette tv series. That series is not reality tv because the situations aren’t real. Try paying some bills while dating the woman and working full time rather than riding a horse in Tuscany.

Kanye West and Kim Kardasian. Enough said.

What’s the deal with Bruce Jenner and Jersey Shore?

13 foods that had a good year. We learn what pour over coffee is. Kim Chi had a good year but she’s not a woman. What’s up with coconut water? Daveed says it doesn’t taste good at all but somehow it made the list.

The smell of leather and smoke smells like butt love. We talk about whether or not we’d do anal.

The space between your balls and your bum is called the causif.

Why Cosmopolitan and Men’s Health are the same magazine.

Prison Sex and Stinkfist. Balls deep is good.

Daveed is craving a grilled cheese sandwich after the epic 10 course meal.

Which would you rather have? Best food ever or best orgasm ever? This one gets controversial.

Grandpa dies minutes before experiencing the threesome his grandson won for him. Grandson inherits the threesome.

Michelle Obama is pissed about Barack’s selfie opportunity. Barack Obama is having a blast at Mandela’s memorial and gets grief for it.

There’s no place in this world for a selfie. Daveed takes his first and last selfie ever, before selfie was even a term. Crazy drunk girl story leads to this selfie.

Would Ronda Rousey be able to kick a man’s ass? TRT in UFC, how is it legal? Alistair Overeem before and after steroids.

Steven Seagal is a badass who taught Anderson Silva and Lyoto Machida how to throw the most vicious front kick to the face the world has ever seen. Yet, he’s never thrown a kick in a single movie he ever made.

Ronda Rousey vs a man baby debate continues and it gets heated up.

The post Protect Your Checks appeared first on Squeels and Wheezies Podcast.

Headless naked selfies are not as good as naked selfies that contain face shots.

Nersin hates his voice when he gets loud. Does he have confidence issues?

We have a special guest on the show today – P Diddy.

We talk about making this a drunk podcast however are about to have an epic ten course meal so we opt out of getting hammered prior to the dinner.

P Diddy tells us about his Winnie the Pooh disfunctional theory.

A children’s book series called Sniff, Lick, Munch. Is the author of this book fucking with us? We also talk about twisted children tv shows.

P Diddy has a theory about yoga practitioners and their love for their feet. Why are yoga practitioners such nice people? What does mindfulness even mean?

Fat is the n word for girls or is it the f word?

Tequila Rose tasts like a strawberry milkshake.

Daveed asks the very important question, who’s more annoying, Eminem or Drake? Daveed says Eminem sounds like Bane meet Kramer.

Twerk, trolls, Madonna’s sex book, and publicity stunts. Is Rihanna really into S&M or is it all BS to sell CDs and concert tickets.

P Diddy and Nersin are flabbergasted to learn Daveed doesn’t find Jennifer Lawrence hot. Lana Del Rey is hotter than Jennifer Lawrence. Jessica Biel has dead eyes. Cats have young eyes.

The guys talk about old songs that would now be considered racist or would never get radio play these days.

Justin Timberlake is mean to reporters who don’t speak English. He was a coward during the wardrobe malfunction debacle.

Alan Thicke’s son Robin Thicke is older than his dad.

Rob Ford. Enough said.

P Diddy got a ticket walking. How is that even possible? Was it a race thing?

How do you hire a prostitute without discussing price? Having sex with a prostitute is now legal in Canada but discussing price is illegal. How does that work?

Gay men came up with gay codes for getting around the adult listings on Craigslist.

Proposing to your girlfriend while getting arrested and already wearing cuffs is a strong move. We talk the best and worst proposals.

Guys who get naked girlfriend selfies then blast them out to friends after breaking up are simply douches. Are headless naked selfies worth taking?

What’s up with guys who show their friends naked photos of their current girlfriend.

Strategies for long distance relationships. Do they even work to begin with? If you sleep around on your long distance mate, does it still count as cheating?

Nersin admits he was a douche when he was younger because he walked and danced in niteclubs.

The guys argue about their taste for Nickelback.

What makes a girl attractive to guys?

They boys get into heavy discussion about MMA. Predictions for the Anderson Silva vs Chris Weidman’s rematch fight. Disagreements over whether Weidman beat Silva or did Silva beat himself in the first fight. Who would make the biggest UFC fight and does it matter if they are both currently champs. Debate over who would win Anderson Silva vs Jon Jones.

Susur Lee runs his restaurant like a kung fu ninja. Daveed can figure out answers to hints based on the slightest bit of information.

We are about to depart to the restaurant for the epic restaurant and Daveed decides whether he should wear stretchy pants because he’s about to eat a champ meal.

P Diddy hates bad boy celebrity chefs and celebrity chefs in general. Is being a chef an easy way to get pussy?

Nersin can’t figure out how Adam Levine has sexual relations with so many A list celebrities and gets called a racist for using the term DINKS – double income no kids.

Are cats assholes and if so, does that make them cool?

What the hell is toxoplasma?

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Daveed hits the record button while we test the levels and Nersin has no idea. A smooth segway into one of the worst customer service experiences ever.

We talk over under of the life of the average podcast. Other successful podcasts are referenced as case studies. Shout out to the $100 Startup author.

How to avoid the absolute worst customer service experience at a drycleaners. It’s easy to foil some of them especially if you move the clothes out of the clothes section. Whaaaaat?

Frustrations continue with poor telephone customer service stories.

Nersin can’t smoothly transition out of a topic and comes up with the worst segway ever which leads to painful discussion about self induced sexual turn offs. Ever wonder if you hit anal? Painful sex without lube is real.

Dr. Drew can tell when a woman had childhood trauma within 10 seconds of a conversation with her and his crazy theories. Does anyone care if a female teacher sleeps with a male student?

Do you prefer fake breasts or real breasts?

A discussion about a mystery hot classmate from high school. Nersin can’t figure out who it is.

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Do people really have that much difficulty thinking of their own topics to talk about at parties that they actually google topic ideas? Find out with yahoo answers. We share the top party conversation starters.

Daveed and Nersin discuss the greatest comics of all time. Is it sexist to not put a female on the top comic list or are female comics not as funny?

Nelson shares his two cheesiest hack jokes. Daveed has heard them a hundred times before.

When you tell someone your phone number or social insurance number, you should tell it with rhythm, three numbers at a time.

Daveed reads out hysterical yahoo questions and yahoo answers. These are absolutely classic. Find out how the teens date these days. How many social networks actually exist.

The dating bases are broken down and discussed.

We absolutely lose our mind in laughter while reading the yahoo answers.

The post Yahoo Answers appeared first on Squeels and Wheezies Podcast.

We give you a behind the scenes look at putting together a podcast with checking mic levels. Haha. Just kidding. We start ripping into ugly celebrities right from the start. Who are we to judge but it’s fun to do anyways. The topic gets deep right away as we admit to which ugly celebrities we would have sex with.

Stupid facebook status updates that should never see the light of day are discussed as we question why these conversations are happening out in public for the world to see.

This podcast is all about shits and giggles or squeels and wheezies whatever those are. But I think it’s the sound Nelson makes when he laughs so hard he can’t breath.

Daveed and Nersin talk about our Lana Del Rey obsession and bad impersonations of her ensue.

What exactly are combos in Daveed and Nersin’s world.

Daveed comes up with a fantastic idea but then can’t remember it.

A devastating discovery that manshowers exist. What goes on during them? You won’t believe what you hear.

Daveed and Nersin break down and analyze why Nersin is so fascinated by strippers and waitresses. Did he have a rough childhood?

Awkward coworkers could be the greatest asset to any company. They provide endless moments of laughing opportunities. Do you have a two faced coworker where you work? This is not a backstabber but a woman that looks hot one day, then hideous the next.

Facebook selfies are out of control. Especially if you are a man baby.

There, their, they’re, thr. Learn how not to use them.

Who are the ugliest celebrities you are willing to have sex with. Daveed and Nersin uncover their list.

Continuing on the ugly topic, who are your ugliest sex partners and why were you willing to have sex with them? Does it still count if you don’t kiss them?

A deep and dark discussion about double standards with sons and teachers. Not really.

As if talking about ugly celebrities was not bad enough, we talk man crushes.

Was releasing the Some Kind of Monster project to the public the worst Metallica decision ever made?

A A Ron Paul or Jesse Pinkman has a hot wife. She is smoking hot sexy.

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